You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize