We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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