it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize