I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
