There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
either way he was missing a nipple.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize