she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
