So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He shit in the fireplace
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize