so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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