well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
