i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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