Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
