I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize