So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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