we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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