Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Green mimosas i think yes
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
