I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
this boner is exhausting
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
