I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize