I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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