so explain again why im purple
no
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
