Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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