...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Randomize
