is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
