If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
