Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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