On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
