Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize