Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
