hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Pappa wants mamma naked
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
