You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
