I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
