Define "chronic" masturbator.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize