dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
