so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
