Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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