You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize