Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
