i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
