I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
