Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize