I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
