OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize