She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Randomize
