would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'm passing your future prison.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
