There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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