dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
