Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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