you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
