Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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