It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
