Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
